in which the protagonist is interviewed.

So, what do you do on a Saturday?

Wellll… I bake bread. What else is there to do?

Isn’t that a lot of carbohydrates?

Sure is. I try to balance the bread-baking with walks or bike rides. There is nary a footpath in our area that I haven’t covered on one Saturday or another.

You began teaching English at your church each week because you wanted to “contribuir a vida da igreja” (contribute to the life of the church) and “conhecer pessoas bem” (know people). Why do only male youth attend your classes?

Because they are in love with me.

Outside your front door is an overturned basket with a chicken named Fudza trapped inside. Any comments?

[protagonist chuckles] Ah, yes. People, especially in rural areas, like to give gifts of live chickens or other fowl. However, this particular chicken - Fudza, as you said – was accidentally left in our truck by a woman Sara was giving a lift to. We discovered him the next day and are now making a half-hearted effort to fatten him up before we consume him. Probably with batatas fritas (french fries).

But Fudza?

Well now, that’s interesting. BFF and I drove up to Niassa province once, a roadtrip that took about 20 hours - or maybe a million years - mostly on dirt roads, and at a stage in the journey when we had become silly beyond reckoning, we crossed a small river called Fudza. It made a big impression.

BFF?

Best Friend Forever (Sara). There could be alternate meanings as well.

At a recent party, you were spotted conversing quite seriously and at length with a total stranger. Was he giving cultural advice or perhaps offering his perspective on the abysmal political situation in Zimbabwe?

Initially I thought he wished to talk to me about the poverty in his community, but as it turned out, he only wanted to inform me that when he goes pee, it hurts a lot. Which sounds like either a UTI or and STD, so I encouraged him to visit the local health post as soon as possible.

Your feet are so dirty. Why?

Because I haven’t bathed in three days.

Wow, it must be difficult to live in an area with so little water.

We actually have plenty of water. I’m just too scared to take a shower when it is so cold in the mornings. Kind of gross.

Why are most of your blog posts so intensely nerdy?

I can’t help myself. I’m sorry.

If you had to choose between: one arm so long that it dragged on the ground, or wheels for feet, which would you choose?

Arm. No question.

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